Having had a short hiatus of foreign holidays in recent years, @potoft and I have had something of a glut this year, by which I mean we'll have been on two. Not being massive fans of either hot weather or being trapped in a plane with people we may wish to eject, regardless of any hazard to our health, the train makes a suitable method of transport (I am aware that people who may be likely to be ejected will be probably have similar feelings about me and will be grateful of being not having to spend a few hours at high altitude with me).
Our last excursion to the continent was inspired by seeing a segment on the TV programme
Coast about the Beglian kusttram, whilst with similarly mediocre wanderlust, this trip was driven by filial duty to see my sister-in-law @pip_en_france, who has been living in Strasbourg.
Aside from the Accor Hotels booking process falling over when 'verified by visa' kicked in and two payments taken (and bookings made) but without any confirmation that the first payment or booking had been processed, the arrangements were simple and easy (on receiving my credit card bill and enquiring the hotel immediately refunded the second amount). A problematic lack of availability at our preferred hotel on one night resolved itself when we were offered a voucher for a free night's stay at a hotel just around the corner in exchange for some organic deodorant. No, seriously.
So all that was left to do was pack the bags and head to St Pancras for the silly o'clock train to Paris Gare du Nord. To get the holiday started I eased myself into a cabbage based diet, by wolfing down a sauerkraut and pastrami bagel. @potoft's priorities were focused on a pain au chocolat to build up her tolerance of butter and chocolate.
On the Eurostar I had booked two airline style seats to avoid any form of engagement with other people and to facilitate appropriate napping without worrying about drool, snoring or a gaping mouth (mine or others). The journey was rather uneventful, and I remain distinctly unexcited about the repeatedly offered opportunity of trying a selection of Waitrose produce 'honestly priced'.
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| Gare du Nord |
It is about 7 or 8 years since we last got the Eurostar to Paris and in comparison to the rebuilt St Pancras I couldn't help but find Gare du Nord disappointing and lacking in romance or charm. We pulled out the handles on the suitcases, set our pace to 'brisk' and wheeled our bags a few hundred metres round the corner to Gare de l'Est, a slightly more attractive station.
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| Gare de l'Est |
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| Western concourse at Gare de l'Est |
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| Selection of French trains |
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| Eastern shopping concourse, Gare de l'Est |
Having arrived at the station and in the knowledge we would easily make our connection we decided to kill some time in a café called appropriately, 'time'. Someone clearly thought that a great concept for a station eatery was to have clocks showing the time in different cities around the world (London, New York, Moscow, Sydney, Peking) - a bit like how I imagine Alan Sugar's kitchen-diner might be arranged. Unfortunately, unless some countries have adopted time zones (I'm looking at you UK) which are 3 hours 17 minutes behind France, I think someone gave up on the concept a while ago.
Other than every flat surface outside being covered in graffiti, we knew we had left the UK when we watched a father give his 10 year old son some cash and sent him into the café. In he traipsed, walked up to the fridge unit, stood on his tiptoes and reached down a can of Carlsberg, got in the queue, handed over the money and walked off with his beer, no questions asked, clutching it like one our resident squirrels stealing from my bird-feeder. There is clearly no 'challenge 25' in France, more a case of if you can do your shoelaces what harm can a beer do?
Not only did we discover in this café lax licensing laws, we also discovered that Coca-Cola's 'with friends' campaign extends to France allowing me to become Pierre and @potoft to be Melissa (it may have been the other way around).
As our platform was announced we headed off, grabbing some flowers for Pip and walking down the platform. Gare de L'est has a large number of platforms but achieves this by having very narrow platforms (think Clapham Common Underground station), made worse by clutter such as disused stairwells, well wishers and smokers puffing their last two packets of fags before boarding the train. Our train was made up of two units, one terminating at Strasbourg and one going to Stuttgart which confused matters as although there was a full run of carriages from 1 to 18 the numbering ran from 1 to 9 before switching halfway along to 18 to 10.
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| Empty TGV |
I was very taken by the TGV, especially as it was a double decker and we were on the top. It felt a lot more modern than previous trains I've been on between Bolougne-sur-Mer, Calais and Lille, which are similar to Eurostar but with a 1980s palette of grey and yellow. Having been sat on the train for 15 minutes, I was less than impressed at the announcement after its scheduled departure that 'personnel' were not on the train and we would not be leaving until they were found. 20 minutes later the Strasbourg express was on its way.
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| TGV Buffet car |
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That's what the vicar said to the boy -
a two and a half hour tutorial
on how to use a smart phone. |
My baseline for train journeys is somewhere between North by Northwest, Strangers on a train, The Lady Vanishes and The 39 Steps so anything that doesn't involve murder, abduction, conspiracy or an unexpected train decoupling, point switching or checkpoints can't but feel somewhat lame.
A recent trip to Birmingham was considered a stonking success as the return leg was pepped up by the disappearance of a man who abandoned his laptop and possessions leading his colleague to fear he had alighted by mistake at Coventry. I confronted the train manager, who denied that the man could be on the train and was definitely not locked in a toilet. On demanding that the train manager unlock a toilet which had been occupied for the duration of the trip, the gentleman emerged from the very cubicle. His story was that he had been 'ill' and had been unconscious - however to the outside observer it was clear that in fact I had thwarted a kidnapping plot.
Having never been to Strasbourg I had no real idea of what the terrain would be like. For long periods the landscape between Calais and Strasbourg is dull. Exacerbating this is the fact that the TGV is built for speed and is very straight and very flat. The moment there is the slightest undulation in the land the train disappears into a cutting, or even worse, a tunnel. On train journeys, there is nothing more enjoyable than staring out of a window on the inside of the bend watching the locomotive pulling the train, alas the very gentle bends on this TGV line does not give this opportunity. There is some beautiful scenery to be had on the TGV, including what looked like a ruined castle, but unfortunately, it requires you to be attentive and patient for long periods, and a glimpse of French scenery is a cruel mistress which will desert you without warning.
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| Flat territory |
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| Cutting |
The one interesting feature of the French landscape on this trip were the water towers every mile or so in places. Whilst most are modern concrete structures and largely identical (imagine what a funnel resting on a toilet roll looks like and then imagine it made out of concrete) there was the odd one with a bit more design or charm, and spotting one of these provided a short-lived pique in my attention.
On arriving at Strasbourg, we discovered that not only are French train platforms are quite low compared to the UK, but when you're in carriage 15 they are particularly low as the platform at Strasbourg is too short for the train.
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| Please mind the jump |
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| Peeling paint |
Strasbourg Station is a bit odd. Its platforms are partially covered by two great arched spans of glass. However, like several European stations I've been to, there is an air of decay which is not evident at British stations on the East Coast Mainline such as York and Newcastle.
The platforms are elevated above the station concourse, meaning access to platforms is via tunnels rather than bridges, and combined with the design of the station building means the main concourse, shops and ticket hall are rather dark, and in addition one cant walk the length of the station building without exiting the original building (you can't get directly from buying a ticket to the main cluster of shops). The remedy to this is a striking modern addition: a large curved glass extension that runs the entire length of the original station building and facilitates access between the three tunnels under the platform and provides an interchange with the underground section of Lines A and D of the Strasbourg tram (line C is accessed at street level outside the station) but can't help but feel tacked on.
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| Glass extension on the front of the station |
